Thanks so much for your comments and contribution to my blog. As you can see it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted here. I shifted over to posting more on my internet marketing coaching site. Although that’s fallen by the way a bit lately as well.

Sounds like you’re at an exciting point in your life. Have you completed your training?

Focus on the feeling alive and don’t worry about the fear. Fear is only a thought!

Best wishes to you for 2011.

Gillian

You are an amazing human being. You have so many attributes already….like congruence. How many people do you know who ‘tell it like it is?’ There really aren’t that many I know. The majority of people only seem capable of shrugging their shoulders, projecting or denying any underlying angst they might be feeling. Of course there are a million reasons to act in this way; peer pressure, status anxiety to name just two.
I think that your honesty and commitment to looking down the barrel of the ‘human condition’ is courageous and thoroughly commendable and it is an extremely hard choice to make.
I’ve just come across your blog having Googled the question ‘What shall I do?’ The truth is I think these last forty three years I’ve been busy ‘doing’ muddling through and searching like some crazed existentialist for meaning and purpose. Life can be utterly crap at times and there really is no escaping it. Two years ago I took the first steps to train to become a counsellor. I have an interview soon to complete this training and quite frankly have never felt so alive and so scared at the same time. Perhaps ways forward involve elements of danger – to feel enlivened one must perhaps stand on the rim of the abyss and stare down into it. Not sure about anything accept feeling uncertain right now. But for all my nerves and indecision and the gut feeling to run I am going to do this – not because I may be any good, or save the world or for any altruistic reasons at all, but simply because I need to feel the danger and try at least to get some inkling of what it feels like to be human. I’m not sure that anyone ever reaches the point of completion, as we area all works in progress. Does anyone ever attain full realisation or become self-actualised? I think phrases such as these are unrealistic and only serve to keep psychologists and dare I say it counsellors in work. For myself there is no ending, no happily ever after, no pot at the end of the psychological rainbow, there is only continuous remodelling, reshaping, renewing; new beginnings and new endings.
Can I just leave you with a great quote that kind of sums up the above – the following is from Emerson’s ‘Self Reliance’
‘There is a time in every man’s education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide; that he must take himself for better, for worse, as his portion; that though the wide universe is full of good, no kernel of nourishing corn can come to him but through his toil bestowed on that plot of ground which is given him to till. The power which resides in him is new in nature, and none but he knows what that is which he can do, nor does he know until he has tried’

Lots of love

Pete x