Archive for commitment

Mar
22

What Are You Waiting For?

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I am becoming more and more aware of all the waiting I do in my life.

At the beginning of last week I exchanged a few emails with Ed on the mentoring programme and felt confused as a result. Rather than check out what I understood by them I made assumptions that kept me stuck and waiting for Friday when I was anticipating the week’s webinar would clear things up.

I was right about the clarification but not in the way I’d imagined.

One of the key points of the webinar was to fail in the field rather than in your head. To stop trying to work everything out, in other words, and to stop waiting for perfection. But just to get on with it.

I realised then that what Ed had been saying earlier in the week was not, as I’d thought, to do more research but was instead, to just get on and use the research I’d already done. Because I was looking for perfection and trying hard to get it “right” I was failing in my head and not taking action as a result. So, feeling inspired after the webinar, I just got on with it and put up my new internet marketing coaching website, warts and all. And that got me to thinking how often we fail in our head instead of in the field of life.

When we don’t take action and get out there, all we’ve got are the thoughts in our heads and fears in our bodies. We have no idea if what we imagine would happen is true or not. Without testing our assumptions and taking action we are stuck. Waiting. But what are we waiting for – more money, more time, more motivation, more energy, more courage?

Sitting around waiting for those things, or thinking about them, is never going to attract them to us. We have to create them by taking action.

So, today, ask yourself what you are waiting for. Where are you failing  in your head?

Then, make a decision to go for it anyway, despite your fears, despite not knowing how it will turn out and take immediate action towards it.

Please leave a comment and let us know how you get on.

Categories : Creating My Life
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Mar
12

Past and Future – Here Be Dragons

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I had my first 1 : 1 mentoring session with Ed yesterday. After a tricky start with Ed trying to pin me down to a market and me fighting for ” freedom”, we finally found a way forward.

So, after the call, I settled down to the work and all was well for a couple of hours. Then the nay-sayers in my head started. But, I soldiered on with my work plan.

Then. this morning, the cacophony was so loud my eyes started to get a bit moist!

G I V E   M E   A   B R E A K!

One day into the journey and I’m already questioning myself, doubting my choices, telling tales of failure and thinking about giving up.

Looking to the future holds endless imaginings of danger. Looking to the past reinforces the stories of why “this won’t work”. So I’m staying in the present today.

Doing the next thing.

One step at a time.

Phew. Another crisis averted.

Categories : Creating My Life
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This morning I found myself thinking about the nature of discipline after reading two different views about how often to publish blog posts. One recommends publishing only when you have something to say and the other suggests writing at regular intervals. The latter is Chris Guillibeau’s preference who says “Set a schedule and never miss a post . . . this isn’t so much about the readership–most people would forgive me if I missed a day, and many wouldn’t even notice. Instead, it’s about SELF-DISCIPLINE”.

Now those of you who have been around a while will remember that on my return from Phoenix, I intended to publish a blog post every day. I didn’t do so for long and so was wondering whether or not Chris’s approach might be a useful one for me to follow. But there’s something about the word ‘discipline’ that leaves me cold.

Whenever I read something that suggests I practice discipline, I find myself silently screaming “No, no. Don’t make me do it. I want to do it my way”. No wonder I don’t like it. The story I tell about discipline is that it is a form of coercion. Something demanded from the outside that necessitates doing it someone else’s way.

It’s a story I suspect, that’s a hangover from school days when the teachers seemed all powerful and from childhood in general when parents or other adults were in control. Discipline conjures up having to tidy my room, do my piano practice or something connected with the PE instructor on the parade ground. And I am obviously not alone. If you look in Google at the most common searches people carry out, that contain the word “discipline”, you will find that of the 200 most popular, way over half (I stopped counting at 100) relate to children, kids, toddlers, teachers, parents, classrooms, schools etc. No wonder the idea has such negative connotations.

But I am no longer a child and am free to choose a new view. I can make it an internal choice now rather than an external command.

However, writing a blog post everyday wasn’t a goal that was connected to something I really wanted. It was a goal I made for it’s own sake. But I DO want to get better at writing. I want to discover more of what I have to say. Writing helps me clarify my thoughts and make adjustments to how I approach things. I hope I will inspire others to think about things differently too and to experiment with other ways of being and doing things.

So rather than try to be disciplined and only post when I have something to say, or set a schedule and never miss a post, or make a post everyday, I would rather put my energy into practising the craft and spend at least 15  minutes a day writing something – anything. Doesn’t matter. Just get my pen on paper. That’s a discipline that’s worth learning for me.

As Steve Chandler would say – “Discipline is remembering what you want”.

Categories : Creating My Life
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Nov
13

Waiting For Magic

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Tuesday felt like a good day. I made my commitment to my project and moved from one thing to the next and it all seemed to fall into place. Since then I’ve been spinning my wheels, waiting passively for something external to move me onto the next thing. Waiting for magic.

I’ve been thinking, it’s a bit ironic that I’m saying I’m committed to creating a workshop about what to do when you don’t know what you want, and here I am, not being able to identify, in the moment what it is I want to do, and getting very stuck in that. Perfect, of course.

One of the ideas I want to get across is that everything you need is in your life right now. So, if I apply that idea to my life what do I see? What opportunities have I been missing while I’ve been waiting for something else to jump up and bite me on the bum?

Remember, I’ve taken advantage of the cosmic hint to write an invitation letter (described in my post about little struggles), and then got hung up because I couldn’t seem to finish it. Then the waiting started. I’ve been making a note of the 30 day challenge “homework” but haven’t taken any action related to it, because I didn’t know what to do. And then it struck me, I didn’t know what to do next because I didn’t have a plan.

OMG The “P” word.

And then the s**t really hit the fan and I came face to face with the truth that is my fear of running this coaching programme. Having a plan suddenly makes it real.

I’d forgotten the difference between intention and commitment and how “You’re not really committed until you’ve proved it by putting in place a supporting structure. Until you do, anything you think you want remains an intention without the power of true commitment and, consequently, is unlikely to materialise.”

So, now I have a choice, do I want to stay stuck and pretend to be playing the game or will I take the next step and create a plan? I choose to re-engage in my project and create a plan. So, once again, I reset my commitment to  enrol 10 people on my 6 month coaching programme called – ‘When You Don’t Know What You Want – Make It Up!’.

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Nov
10

28 Day Challenge

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There’s 28 days until I fly back to Phoenix and to the final weekend of The Coaching School and I want to draw together all that I’ve leaned so far and set myself a new challenge.

When I got back to the UK in July I was creative, brave and playful. And high energy. I followed the twists and turns of my process through the Coaching School, sometimes feeling low and others excited and then landed, most recently, in a place of giving up trying to make things happen.  Here I found a lot more peace and a deal of appreciation for what I already have. But I also felt reactive rather than in charge. So now I’m going to experiment with combining the two.

I want the energy of playing big combined with the peace of living in the moment. I want commitment to a goal but without attachment. I want to live from no history. Just today – anew! Just me and My Way. Whatever this game of life is or isn’t, I’m going to play My Game by My Rules.

To give me some structure to make this easier I’m going to do Michael Neill’s Creating the Impossible Challenge again. That way I will have a focus each day so, if I get stuck, I can more easily get moving again.

These are My rules:

  • I will not struggle nor suffer.
  • If it’s not fun I will find a way to make it fun or not do it.
  • I will not care what others think of me.

My Impossible Goal is:

To enrol 10 people on my 6 month coaching programme called – ‘When You Don’t Know What You Want – Make It Up!’

That seems pretty impossible from here since the programme doesn’t exist yet. So it’a a good choice.

Part of the challenge is to take 100 steps towards your impossible goal so this is Step 2 – announcing my commitment on my blog. Step 1 was announcing my commitment to the Coaching School group.

Expect more soon . . .

Categories : An Impossible Goal
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Life Moves Archives

Gillian Pearce – Life Moves

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About Life Moves

Life Moves is an unfolding story of my journey to discover and create what I truly want from life. I hope you will find my writings helpful, inspirational, encouraging, amusing or, at the very least, usually worth reading. Please feel free to comment on any posts about which you have an opinion. Or make one up. I do it all the time and it can be very dull, alone in cyberspace.

Bon Voyage!

Gillian