Comments on: When You Don’t Know What You Want

By: gillian

gillian — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 18:03:29 +0000

Hi Chieko

Thanks for your comments. Your question inspired me to get writing again and you can see my response in my latest post – planning from the present.

Cheers
Gillian

By: Chieko

Chieko — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 01:29:38 +0000

Hi Gillian,

How was your 4 week period? I just happened upon your site during a search on this topic. Figuring out what I want is very challenging. I’m so glad that there were pages and pages of search results that came up! Makes me feel like I’m not the only one asking it.

By: gillian

gillian — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 17:05:54 +0000

Hi Ian

Thanks for your comment and encouragement. One trick to making a process goal work well for you is to clarify a way you can measure it. Then you can check how well you’re doing and adjust, if necessary. Also, if you’re anything like me, you’ll need to keep reminding yourself that your process goal is what you’re really about and outcomes (in the material sense) are just a possible end to a means and are expendable. Practising commitment without attachment helps as well.

Gillian

By: Ian

Ian — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 12:08:10 +0000

Gillian
A nice change to find someone who focuses on what to do if you *don’t* know your goals, rather than simply working out some objectives: having spent most of my life trying to work this out, finding your site today was a definite move forward.
Your comment about being the “owner of the PROCESS of my life rather than of the outcomes” was spot on. I guess one needs some sort of goal even if – like the Pole Star – it is a tool to help you keep your bearings, rather than an end in itself.
Keep up the good work.
Ian

By: gillian

gillian — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 10:49:35 +0000

Hi Jacqueline

Thanks for your kind comments on my blog. Glad you enjoyed reading it.

I have had a gap of a month or so without writing but am delighted to be back writing again today. I like your approach of choosing certain virtues as a general way of showing up in life. Being always seem to be a more powerful approach than doing. (Although I often forget). This time, what rescued me from being under the grey cloud was my reconnection with my inner truth, so truth is now firmly on my personal list of how I want to show up.

Wishing you a wonderful journey.
Love
Gillian

By: JacqJolie

JacqJolie — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 13:57:17 +0000

Hi Gillian,
I think there’s a huge group of people out there needing some sort of map to the terrain that you are traveling now – and I’m sometimes one of them!
I spent years spinning my wheels thinking about a “higher purpose” and watched my life spiral down into indecision and confusion while doing that.
For some time, I’ve simply followed a process of living in accordance with Aristotelian (Nichomachean) ethics – virtues like courage, magnanimity, wit… This seems to work well for working towards any goal and as a general way of showing up for life.
Great blog, I really enjoyed reading it.
Jacqueline