Aspiring Geek,  Creating My Life

Connecting the Internal to the External

Continuing the story from my planning from the present and combining past and future posts . . .

The exciting news is . . . I’m in! I’ve been accepted into Ed Dale’s mentoring programme and the first 1 : 1 session is on Thursday.

The first step was to create a pre-start questionnaire which was a little unnerving since a number of the questions didn’t really apply to my situation. I’m feeling a bit nervous about how Ed will view my approach but am also not going to waste any energy worrying about it in advance.

As I said when I applied:

I am fascinated by what makes people “tick” and why some of us are successful and others not etc. etc. AND I am fascinated by technology and the internet. I would love to be able to combine the 2.

That is the area I’m really interested in – where the 2 worlds collide. How can you be successful when it’s not lack of information/a system that’s the problem. It’s your habits/beliefs/behaviours/personality etc? And, can the “you” bit be built into the learning process? How can technology help us do that?

Apart from combining two fields I enjoy working in there is another exploration that’s important to me and that is living from the inside out versus living from the outside in.

My previous attempts at setting up an internet marketing business have been externally focussed. That is, the motivation has been the money I wanted to earn (external outcomes) and the tactics that would get me there. To be fair most of the courses are taught this way and after trying and failing at a number of them I realised that my failure wasn’t due to what the courses were teaching but to a lack of consciousness about what I was doing and why I was doing it.

I’m not alone. Thousands of people have spent thousands of dollars chasing the internet marketing dream but relatively few have succeeded. The money and the ease with which it can be generated attracts us but it is often an habitual reaction to the idea that money will make us happy. Even if that were true, we don’t stop and consider whether or not the promises of the get rich dream is what we want anyway. So we find ourselves chasing a dream that’s not really ours and then feel upset when we don’t succeed.  The consequence of  focussing exclusively on external goals without matching them to our internal values makes it impossible to keep going when the going gets though. So we abandon whatever we’ve been trying and move on to the next shiney, new toy.

Having tired of that I moved back to coaching last year but unwittingly kept loosing the plot when I made the same mistake, albeit in a different arena. Setting exclusively external goals was a road that led to low energy and confusion. But it also led to great learning.

So combining, the lessons of the two I can say that a lack of external structure leaves me directionless, listless and feeling unfulfilled while “enforced” structure, by way of a plan I’ve concocted (or bought) for it’s own sake, leaves me bored , unable to keep my commitments to myself and feeling unfulfilled.

So, I am approaching my year of mentoring differently.

Part of the deal for acceptance on the programme was to agree to create measurable, specific goals. Starting out they will be about building a subscribers list of people who are interested in exploring and consciously creating their lives and who enjoy reading and commenting here.

The mentoring will create a framework within which I can explore and challenge those beliefs/stories I tell myself that hold me back. The numbers will give me something more concrete to measure and to challenge myself with.

Even before the programme started I confronted the discipline of writing (or lack thereof) and committed myself to my 15 minutes a day goal.  And, I noticed my tendency of constantly waiting for something else to happen before I begin and have made choices to start anyway.

I see this year as an opportunity to learn from a master in his field, to take a curious peep into a world I know little of, to hang out with interesting and inspiring people to challenge myself and to keep stepping outside my comfort zone. Internet marketing then becomes the structure within which I can experiment and dance with life. I am excited about what I will create.